'Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. ‘Philippians 4:6-7 MSG

 I was listening to a podcast when I heard a quote that brought so much clarity, I couldn’t get it out of my head. Here it is: “Anxiety results from wanting to control something God has not given us to control.” I didn’t remember the name of the person or why she was on the podcast, but what she said made so much practical sense. (I looked it up later. So, if you are interested, it was Joanna Weaver’s podcast, The Living Room, and the guest was Sharon Hodde Miller, author of The Cost of Control: Why We Crave It, the Anxiety It Gives Us, and the Real Power God Promises Us.) As I pondered her statement, a formula took shape in my brain, “A – C = P,” Anxiety – Control = Peace. Easy to remember and a goal worth aiming for.

 Anxiety is something we all experience. Anxiety steals peace and commands focus. Whether it’s something personal about your family, or a job, or something broader like politics and the world situation, anxiety creeps up behind us, leaps upon us and gets us in a stranglehold. Ever feel that way?

Your brain goes in circles, trying to resolve something you are powerless to resolve. You can’t sleep and every waking moment is consumed with mental and practical fruitless attempts to solve the problem. Suddenly, it seems like nothing else is happening in your life. What started as a thought becomes a huge shadow. What do you do?

Let me just divert here for a moment. My purpose is to address the anxiety that every person faces at one time or another, but mental health professionals are often dealing with anxiety that has gone beyond normal boundaries. When anxiety becomes so severe that it is debilitating, and you are unable to function normally, please see a mental health professional. There are neurological reasons why some people experience anxiety where brain chemistry has been affected and medication will help. But medication won’t eliminate the anxiety that we all deal with. Then you can put into practice what I am discussing here.

So, how do you handle life’s unexpected twists and turns? Things happen. That’s life. Something occurs that we don’t expect. People in our world make choices we disagree with. We may attempt to “help” by trying to talk them out of it or by giving them advice. When they don’t take it, we may feel angry or hurt. How do you handle it when life seems to be heading in the wrong direction? How do you know if the desire to control is producing anxiety and stealing your peace?

 What are your anxiety indicators? Anxiety is defined as “distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune.” What does anxiety look like for you? It can manifest itself in a variety of ways. You may feel tension in your body somewhere. Perhaps your brain is stuck on repeat, playing a situation over and over in your head in a never-ending loop. Maybe you are constantly feeling angry about a situation, thinking of all the coulda, shoulda, woulda things that you or someone else did or didn’t do. Maybe you are playing out every single “what if” in your head, afraid of what may, or may not, happen. Do any of those descriptions fit you right now? If not right now, do you recognize your patterns? Are you aware of when you are experiencing anxiety?

 What are your anxiety motivators? What are the things in your life that make you want to jump into action to try to control an outcome? Are your kids making stupid…um…let’s not say that…are your kids making decisions you disagree with? Is a co-worker trying to outshine you? Is the economy messing up your well-thought-out financial plan?

A good indicator of your anxiety motivators is how you respond to them. The truth is that you probably jump into “control mode” without even realizing it. You probably don’t recognize your own control strategies. I know I didn’t. I always thought I was “just trying to help.” It took a long time to recognize that my helpful efforts were really control strategies.

 So, what are some control strategies? Well, I gave you one of mine, trying to “help” or trying to “fix” the situation. That one is definitely easy to miss. Helping is supposed to be good, right?

Or perhaps you are one of those who will just step in and take over. Someone has to, right? Everything is falling apart, at least you think so, so you just step into action. It’s another form of trying to “help” but is more obviously taking control of the situation.

Perhaps you just want to “talk sense” into someone. You give unsolicited advice and direction. You try to talk someone into doing what you think is best and out of doing what you think is bad. Words are a more subtle way to control than action, but it’s still control. Sorry!

I know that I am going to be stepping on someone’s toes here, but it has to be said. One way we try to control is by telling God what to do about it and calling it prayer. There are times for declarative and directive prayers. The problem is that we don’t often follow the Holy Spirit’s leading about when to enter into those kinds of prayers. We declare and decree what we want to happen without regard to what God’s will is in the situation. 1 John 5: 14 says this, “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him. “ (1 John 5:14-15) The key concept here is to pray “according to HIS will.” We often try to control God by praying according to our own will. Only the Holy Spirit knows your motivation. Your challenge and mine is to have enough humility to let Him show us our own motivation before we declare and decree. I have found myself being stopped by the Holy Spirit in the middle of intense, declarative prayers as He revealed my own controlling motivations. Ugh! It isn’t pretty, but I am grateful for His leading. My relationship with God is severed when I try to control things that aren’t mine to control. I don’t want that!

What is the anxiety eliminator? Bring it to God How can we deal with anxiety? The answer is simple, but not easy. Remove control by choosing to trust God. I know, easier said than done, but that leads me back to the formula: A – C = P. Anxiety – Control = Peace. Peace results when I let go of my desire to control the situation. Peace is the result of trust.

Where are your thoughts these days? Isaiah 26:3 NLT says, “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord God is the eternal Rock.” Thinking about God and His goodness instead of the situation is an expression of trust. Trust is choosing to rely on God to work everything out for the best, even if it isn’t the way I think it should work out. Trust requires humility. I have to rely on something outside my own resources and understanding. Trust involves release and rest. When I trust I leave the outcome to God. How are you doing with that, my friend?

 Are you a worrier? Philippians 4:7-7 NLT says, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Worry is the mental equivalent of trying to “help” or stepping in to fix a situation. Prayer is the vehicle by which we bring it to God. Thanks is the expression of trust in His goodness. The result is that He leaves me with His peace, a piece of Himself as a reminder of all that He is. His peace protects me regardless of the outcome. Peace in God is not dependent on an outcome, but on His character!

 Is Christ truly at the center of your life? I love how the Message paraphrase of the Bible states Philippians 4:6-7:

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”

 The bottom line: Put Christ at the center and worry will fall away. That’s a goal worth aiming for!

 So, Dear Friend, what are your anxiety indicators? How do you recognize when anxiety is taking root in your life? What are your anxiety motivators? What are the things that trigger anxiety for you? Finally, my friend, how can you engage the anxiety eliminator and experience God’s peace?

It’s not easy to be honest with ourselves about our own control strategies, but when you and I get honest with ourselves and with God we can engage the anxiety eliminator, give it to God, give up control and receive His peace regardless of the situation. The only thing I am supposed to control is ME!

A – C = P: Anxiety - Control = Peace.

Key Thought: Peace results when I let go of my desire to control.

A Scripture to Consider: 'Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. ‘Philippians 4:6-7 MSG

A YES Challenge: Reflect on one situation in your life that is causing you anxiety. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal your control strategies. Then choose to let go of control and receive the peace that God has for you.

Prayer: Father God, when I recognize my anxiety indicators, help me to make the choice to trust You. Because I believe You are good and You love me, I choose to trust that You will work all things out for my good and for Your glory. I release all control now and place my concerns into Your hands. I receive the peace You want to give me; I receive Your peace. In Jesus’ name. Amen.