'O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. ' Psalms 139:1

There’s a lot going on in my life right now. What about you? We all have stuff happening, right? How are you feeling about all that you are experiencing? Do you really know?

The truth is that most of us don’t slow down enough to be in touch with our emotions. We serve others. We take care of our families. We work. We pursue personal goals. We keep so busy that we don’t have time to really feel anything. But all the emotions we don’t process still exist below the surface of our lives. Without realizing it, what we don’t know about our own emotions spills over and affects our relationships. Like a jar of salad dressing that is continually shaken, everything is all mixed together. You can’t notice the individual ingredients, but each ingredient flavors all the others. What happens when you stop shaking the jar? Some ingredients rise to the top and others sink to the bottom, right? As life slows down, those feelings that have been mixed in with everything else start to rise to the surface.

Maybe you are having trouble naming what you feel. Maybe you are unsure of how to process it. Maybe you are among the many who, as social media proves, are just continually busy. Part of the unconscious motivation for that is to keep the jar shaken up and push all those feelings back down.

What about you? How are you handling what is rising to the surface? Maybe, just maybe, God is offering you the opportunity to experience Him as you process your emotions. All your feelings matter, and God wants to help you process them so that He can use you to bring peace and stability to those around you.

I firmly believe that knowing myself helps me to know God better. As I understand myself and my own emotions, I realize how much I need God to help me navigate them. I find that I serve others better when I understand myself.

How are you feeling? Do you even know? What’s going on in there?

Emotions are too scary to face on our own. I’d like to offer you this tool for recognizing and processing what you are feeling with God. God can be your best companion and guide as you travel through all that lies beneath the surface of your life. God cares about how you feel. He wants to help you to understand and manage your emotions. Why? Because when you do you will not only know yourself better and be better able to represent Him in the world, but you will also know Him better, and that delights His heart.

So, here goes.

First, find a quiet place and a time when you can take a few undisturbed moments. I understand that may be tricky if everyone is home but do your best. Be as creative as you need to be. Taking care of you helps you to take better care of them! This is super important! Connecting with God doesn’t have to be a long drawn-out process. It can be as simple as grabbing a few minutes.

Get in touch with God’s presence. Breathe in. Breathe out. Become aware that He is with you because He is.

Give God thanks. It’s amazing how a few moments of gratefulness can open the gates into God’s presence. Be specific and keep it simple. The sun. Your kids. What you had for dinner. An aromatic, hot cup of coffee or tea. Small steps of thanks become stepping stones to greater praise.

Go with God into what you are feeling. Key words: WITH GOD. As you look back on your day or your week ask Him to show you what you are feeling about what has happened and to help you understand it.

Here are a few questions to consider:

What am I mad about?

What am I sad about?

What am I afraid of?

What am I glad about?

Do your best to let the Holy Spirit guide you. If you aren’t sure that He is, then simply choose to trust that He is. He honors that trust.

Grapple with your feelings in God’s presence. This can be difficult but be honest with yourself and with God about how you are feeling. Everything you feel is important. What you submerge and ignore affects your ability to function with faith. I have come to believe that it takes more faith to be honest with God about my negative and difficult feelings than it does to quote Scripture and say everything is fine. True faith faces facts. True faith is grounded in truth, including the truth of how I feel. So, go ahead and get real about those feelings, but remember to include God in your grappling. Just acknowledging your questions, hurt, disappointment, and pain to Him can bring great healing.

Get right with God through confession. Repent where you need to. I find that as I am honest with God about my disappointments and hurts, I also start to see my own selfish motivations and where I have neglected to trust Him in that relationship or situation. Repentance doesn’t have to be deeply emotional or complicated. Repentance is as simple as taking your dusty hands and running them under clean water. Quick. Simple. Freeing. The goal is to connect with God. Repentance removes obstacles to that connection.

Go forward with God through praise. You hear the kids knocking at the bathroom door or your spouse is calling you and you know that your precious quiet moment with God is over. Don’t go open the door just yet. They can wait. Quickly thank God for His goodness in going with you into that scary place and helping you to process, even if you didn’t get to a full resolution just yet. You’ll grab another minute when you can. Thank Him for being with you through it all.

What has amazed me as I have used this simple guide is how quickly I sense God’s presence just by setting my heart to become aware of Him and how that sense of His presence grows as I offer Him thanks. As I have entered into remembering the events of the day with Him and asked Him to help me recognize my feelings, as I have asked myself the questions in His presence, I have been so aware of Him guiding me to feelings I hadn’t recognized and helping me to name them so that I can then wrestle with them in His presence. It has been challenging and freeing, unsettling, and comforting. But the most important takeaway has been a greater awareness of His presence and a deeper feeling of connection with Him.

That is what I hope for you, Dear Friend. Why take the time to do this? Ultimately, it’s not just about being a better you, although you will be. You’ll be a better parent, spouse, friend, employee, volunteer. But the real reason to go through what lies beneath the surface is to find God there. The greater gift is not who you become, but Who helps you in the becoming. What’s going on in there? God knows. You will find Him there.

Key thought: God wants to help you manage your feelings because they matter.

A Scripture to consider: 'O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. ' Psalms 139:1

A YES challenge: Take some time in God’s presence using this tool. Write what He shows you in your journal. Stop later in the day and evaluate how processing your feelings with God has made a difference in your relationships. Make note of that in your journal as well.

Prayer: Father, this time has been so challenging. You know all that has happened and is happening in my life. I don’t know what the future will look like, and I have been unwilling to admit just how anxious and angry that makes me. I have been unwilling to admit a lot of the emotions that I have been dealing with. Help me to process them with You. You are my safe place. You are my refuge and strength. You are my help in times of trouble. I choose to trust You with what’s inside of me. Amen.