Sad is not Bad. Anger is not Evil. What Does God Want Me To Do With My Feelings?
So much is happening in our nation and world right now. The COVID-19 crisis has forced everyone out of the routines that bring them comfort and a sense of control, causing anxiety levels to increase like smoldering kindling. The atrocity of George Floyd's death has ignited what was smoldering and given vent to all the pent up anxiety and anger, re-injuring the deepest of unhealed wounds. The pushed-down, unexpressed, unprocessed emotion has erupted in protest. Some righteous anger has led to righteous action, while other expressions have been retribution and revenge.
I have watched these unfolding events without being aware of emotion on the surface. I have mentally acknowledged the horror and injustice without a sense of emotion attached, but I know that I do have feelings about it. I realized that I needed to take time with God to go with Him into that place of feeling, following a process I shared with you a few weeks ago. (What’s Going On In There? A Guide For Staying In Touch With What’s Beneath the Surface? Click here to read.)
I started by getting in touch with God's presence and giving Him thanks. Then I asked myself and God, “What am I feeling about all this?” As God and I began to go together into my feelings, I recognized a feeling of helplessness. It all seems too big for me to do anything about it. But I sensed God whisper to me, “If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem.” I don’t want to be part of the problem. This is a place where I had to get right with God, to repent, and it challenged me to go deeper.
We had to grapple through a few layers of reflection to get to the root, the depth of what I have been feeling. God helped me to name it as sadness. What I feel about the racial divide gaping in our nation. the COVID-19 crisis and people's responses, is deep sadness. So much loss and hurt. It can be overwhelming to feel that sadness. "It isn’t supposed to be this way!" echoed in my soul. As God and I grappled with this, He showed me that the sadness is a reflection of His sadness. It isn’t supposed to be this way. This is not what He wants for the people He has created. God designed us to be in perfect unity with Him and with each other. It’s the sadness that results from living in a sin-cursed world.
An article at GotQuestions.org entitled "What does the Bible say about sadness?" (Click here to read. ) says this, “Sadness is either the direct or indirect result of sin, and since we live in a fallen world, sin is a normal part of life. (Psalm 90:10)” Jesus must have felt this kind of sadness every day of His life. This isn’t what He planned for humanity. This isn’t what He wants. If we take the time to be honest with ourselves about our emotions, we might recognize that we also feel this sadness more often than we would like to admit. Recognizing the sadness is one thing, but what am I supposed to do with it? Your first reaction might be to try to make yourself feel better through a variety of appropriate, or even inappropriate, activities. Or, you might ignore it completely and move on. But I believe that God has something better for you and for me.
God has given us emotions to lead us to action. Many people are extremely angry right now and they are taking action, from righteous protests to unrighteous rioting. I am more likely to feel sad than angry. But that sadness is equally valuable. Just like righteous anger it is meant to lead me to righteous action. For me, then, this sadness isn’t fully my own. It is the burden God has given me to lead me to pray. It is a reminder to intercede on behalf of individuals and our nation. I am asking God what other action He might be asking of me. I will not use a call to prayer as an excuse to do nothing else. If God leads me to other action I want to obey, but I have to start by recognizing that the feeling that this is too big for me to be of any help is not true. It's a lie and every lie is an enemy of God. If I am not part of the solution, then I am part of the problem. I want to be part of the solution.
Prayer is a valuable action that connects to God’s power, but not only His power. It also connects me to His compassion and care for people. Prayer is not about making God do something. It is about connecting with what He wants to do and agreeing with Him. Prayer is uniting with God’s heart in a powerful way. Prayer is about changing me so that I can become God’s instrument in changing circumstances. Beginning with prayer allows me to be a conduit of His power into circumstances that only He can affect. My agreement with Him in prayer invites Him to enter into the situation in His power and for His purposes. It cooperates with Him in what He wants to do.
Dear Friend, where does God have you in all of this? How are you feeling? What actions might your feelings be leading you to? How might God be calling you to cooperate with Him in what He wants to do?
Discover these things by getting in touch with God's presence and giving thanks and then by going with Him into your feelings and grappling with them together with Him. Get right with God where you need to, and then go forward into the action He is calling you to. (Click here to further explore this process.)
Reconciliation is part of who God is. it will always be a part of what He does. Forgiveness and justice are also part of who He is and, therefore, are part of what He does. Righteous anger leads to righteous action, not retribution. As a believer, God calls you and me to reflect His character in how we respond.
How might He want you to be a part of the solution?
Key Thought: God has given us emotions to lead us to action.
A Scripture to consider: “From the ends of the earth, I cry to you for help when my heart is overwhelmed. Lead me to the towering rock of safety, for you are my safe refuge, a fortress where my enemies cannot reach me.” Psalms 61:2-3 NLT
A YES Challenge: Take time in God’s presence to recognize and name what you are feeling in response to current events in our world. Ask God what action He wants you to take as a result.
Prayer: Lord, I never learned to recognize my emotions as messages from You. I have been feeling a lot recently, but have tried to ignore or smooth them over. Help me learn to process my feelings with You and help me learn to seek You for how I need to act in response to my feelings. Amen.