“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord GOD is the eternal Rock.” Isaiah 26:3-4 NLT
When you look at the news headlines, don’t you just want to tell them what they need to do to make things right? The constant squabbling between those with differing opinions is perpetually swirling in the air, clouding our vision, dimming hope for a peaceful future in our nation or in the world.
Like the football fan who yells at the TV telling the quarterback what he should have done, I have a tendency to look at people and situations, on the news or in person, and think that if they would just do things my way, everything would turn out okay. I hate to admit it, but I am a recovering fixer. They say admitting a problem is the beginning of overcoming it and I admitted that problem — let’s call it what it is: an addiction — a long time ago, but any recovery process is slow, isn’t it? I have come a long way, but I still have a looooong way to go! What about you? Are you a fixer?
When my kids were young, I read an article In a Christian parenting magazine that pegged me in an uncomfortably accurate way. It was called Confessions of Mr. and Mrs. Fix-it. The point of the article was that, as parents, we try so hard to fix the things in our kids that we think need correcting, but, very often God will use someone else to finally enlighten our kids to their need for change. I recognized my own patterns of constant fixing as I read the article and squirmed. Perhaps that was the moment when I first admitted my fixing habit. It made me more aware of my need to trust God with my kids instead of taking on all the responsibility for behavior repair. Still, even now that they are grown, I have to keep working on it.
My highest desire for my kids, then and now, has always been that they would live whole-heartedly for Jesus. God has gone out of His way over the years to remind me that He is ultimately the one who will teach them (Isaiah 54:13), and that “fixing” them is His responsibility. He won’t give up on them and will continue to pursue them relentlessly. He’ll do the same for your kids, if you have them.
Whether or not you have kids, think about those people in your life that you want to fix. Come on, be honest! You have a few of those, don’t you? Some of them might be people you see on the TV news, not just the people you actually interact with. Just as God has not called me to be the fixer for my kids, God hasn’t called you to fix the people in your life either. He has called you to influence them by prayers and by your example. But while you wait for Him to do the fixing how do you relax and find peace? Here are a few things I have learned along the way.
God is the one who maintains my peace. I can’t make myself be at peace. I have to receive it as a gift from God. When I look at those situations that need fixing, — And, oh boy, they sure do need fixing! — and when I feel that desire to control rise up (You do realize that the urge to fix is actually a desire to be in control, right?), I have to make a conscious decision to give it to God. Only then can He give me the peace I need. We make an exchange. I give Him the person or situation. He gives me the peace, and as long as I don’t try to fix it, He maintains that peace. And, by the way, the peace that He protects is perfect. That means it is complete and constant. It’s perfect because it is dependent on the Perfect One, not any other person or circumstance.
Peace comes as a result of trust. A simple statement, but not an easy process What does trust look like here? The bottom line: Letting God do the fixing without telling Him how to do it! Getting to that point might take a little struggle on my part or your part. We fixers think we know exactly how to solve the problem or resolve the situation. We see it clearly in our minds and we want to articulate it to those involved. If they won’t listen, then we will express it to anyone who will listen, and we all know that God is a great listener, right?
He will most certainly listen, but He is going to do what He thinks is best, not what I tell Him is best. I can save myself a lot of trouble by starting at that point. It might look like this, “God, You see this situation. I know what I think should happen, but I trust that You are going to do what is best. I let it go into Your hands. Let Your will be done. Amen.” That is a simple-not-easy kind of prayer, but I can only receive peace when I pray that way. (Sigh!) Are you ready to take that plunge into peace?
Peace results when my thoughts are fixed on God instead of what I want to fix. The truth is that you and I often feel like our thoughts are in control of us, rather than that we are in control of our thoughts. But, we do have a choice about where our thoughts go. Let me explain.
Your brain may begin to play out the fixing scenario. You know, all the ways that the situation would resolve if everyone would just do it your way, if everyone would just listen to you. When your brain begins the fixing film reel, you have a choice. You can let that film play out, and then loop over and over, because that is what happens, right? OR, you can turn off the projector and pray instead. “Lord, this person, this situation, is out of my control. I feel myself wanting to fix it, even though I know I can’t. Help me to stay focused on You instead of the problem. I choose to think about You, Your goodness, Your love and Your power. I trust You instead of me. Amen.” After the praying, do whatever you need to do to follow through on what you told God. Read Scripture and meditate on it, maybe even memorize a particularly helpful verse. Listen to worship music or a sermon. Do what you need to do to stay focused on God’s ability to handle what is concerning you. (Psalm 138:8) It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.
Dear One, we all have a lot to be concerned about right now. If we are honest with ourselves, there are thousands of things we’d like to fix, from the news headlines to the next-door neighbor to family members far from God. The burden is too big for you and it is too big for me. We lose our peace when we try to take on the fixing. We gain our peace when we fix our thoughts on the One who is worthy of our trust because He is the fixer. God doesn’t hold us responsible for fixing the people and situations around us. He holds us responsible for responding with Christ-like character, for fixing our thoughts on Him. No other fixing allowed!
Key thought: Peace results when I stop trying to fix it.
A Scripture to consider: “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord GOD is the eternal Rock.” Isaiah 26:3-4 NLT
A YES challenge: Sit for a moment in God’s presence and allow Him to bring to mind a person or situation you have been trying to fix. Bring that situation before Him in prayer. See yourself intentionally putting it in God’s hands and receiving His peace in exchange. You may need to do this more than once!
Prayer: Lord, I confess to You my desire to fix things. I admit that, if I could be in control, everything would turn out according to my plan. But I am not in control. You are. I choose to fix my thoughts on You and trust You to give me peace in exchange. Amen.