'Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ' Colossians 3:12

You stand in front of the mirror. The face looking back at you is familiar, but how do you describe the person that you see? What defines you? Who are you? How do you answer that question, my friend?

That may be an easy question, but then again it may not be. My younger self was defined by the expectations of other people. My greatest fear was making the wrong decision or disappointing someone else. My identity was based on avoiding conflict. I didn’t really know who I was. I let what other people thought define me. I was afraid to voice my opinion. Afraid to express my own needs and wants. Afraid of failing. Afraid of rejection. Afraid to be me and unsure of who that person was.

Do you know who you are? A strong sense of identity will settle you. You won’t be as heavily influenced by others or by the media. Knowing who you are brings peace and confidence. You are who God says you are. Do you know who God says you are?

I was leading others through a Bible study when God used the content to give me an identity statement that settled my soul and gave me the confidence to just be who He says I am and not live in the fear of failure and rejection. It has steadied and focused me and can do the same for you.

It comes from Colossians 3:12, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” I know that may not seem like an identity statement at first. It is a direction on how to act, but the direction is given to a specific kind of people. The people who are to “clothe yourselves with...” those characteristics are chosen, holy and dearly loved, and as a result that is how they should behave. Chosen. Holy. Dearly loved. That’s who you are!

Chosen. God chose you. When you and I were born our parents got what they got. They didn’t get to choose who their child would be. I knew my parents loved me, but I also knew that in the Italian culture my dad came from it was preferred for the oldest child to be a boy to carry on the family name. No one ever said, “I wish you were a boy” but I was the oldest child. I absorbed an identity of being second choice, the consolation prize. That was never anyone’s intention, but it’s still the fact.

To God I am not second choice. I am not the consolation prize. I am a chosen child. He knew that I would be a firstborn female and He is okay with that. I am not a disappointment to Him. I can confidently express my needs and wants because I am CHOSEN.

Holy. Holy does mean pure and perfect when it describes God. But when used to describe people and things other than God it means to be set apart for God. You and I are holy. We are set apart for God. That is an amazing thing!

You are set apart for God. Someone else’s thoughts about you, what they want you to do, who they want you to be, don’t really matter. He has a plan and a purpose for your life and for mine. Because I am set apart for His purposes, pursuing that purpose supersedes everyone else’s desires for me. I am holy. I am God’s. I want to do what He wants me to do and be who He wants me to be. That is what matters most. I am HOLY.

Dearly loved. You, dear friend, are dearly loved by your heavenly Father. Whatever you experienced in your family is not an indicator of God’s love for you. My parents did the best they could and so did yours. But imperfect people are not capable of loving perfectly. God is not angry at you. He is not disappointed in you. Allowing myself to absorb the truth that I am dearly loved by God regardless of my performance has been transformational for me. I still struggle with fear of failure at times. I still evaluate myself based on my own performance. I still fear disappointing others. But understanding that I am dearly loved by God makes those voices so much quieter than they were for so many years. Those voices no longer define my identity even though they try to. My identity has become rooted in God’s love for me. I am DEARLY LOVED.

At the beginning of each year, I choose a word as a focus for the year and a companion Scripture to guide my thoughts. A few years ago, I chose the word “LOVED” and this Scripture, “May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” (Ephesians 3:19 NLT). I spent the year meditating on the truth that I am loved by God and made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from Him. That truth has become part of my identity. I am dearly loved and so are you, my friend!

Dear Friend, when you know who you are it can help you to stand firm in the storms that overtake you, through the unexpected and the planned, through the relational tangle that sometimes is life, through all that you face. Hold fast to the identity that God has given you. You are who He says you are. YOU are chosen, holy and dearly loved!

Key Thought: You can stand firm in every storm when you know who God says you are.

A Scripture to Consider: 'Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ' Colossians 3:12

A YES Challenge: Do you view yourself as chosen, holy, and dearly loved by God? How might it change you to see yourself that way? How will you begin to appropriate this identity? Consider memorizing Colossians 3:12 or Ephesians 3:19 as a tool to meditate on your identity in Christ.

Prayer: Father, I am overwhelmed by Your great love for me. You have chosen me, set me apart for Yourself, and demonstrated that I am dearly loved by You. Help me to walk in that identity. Let it shape my responses and my relationships. Help me to walk in confidence as a chosen, holy, and dearly loved child. Amen.