An Empty Place At the Table - Tribute to Tim

October 31, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

"Let love be your highest goal!" 1 Corinthians 14:1 NLT

How many friends do you have who are so close that you decide to create a new family name from your two last names? What's that you say? You've never heard of such a thing? Never even thought of it? Let me introduce you to the "Zillardnik" family.

The Millards and Zahradniks attended the same church, but were no more than acquaintances until 1995. One ministry of the church we attended was to host baby and wedding showers for congregants. After the birth of our youngest child a shower was held for us which included both men and women. We found out later that Tim and Ginny Millard had felt called to plan that shower for us.

That summer, after serving together at VBS, Tim and Tom made a date to go to the movie Apollo 13. The guys thought it would be a good idea for Ginny to hang out with me, and our three kids, while they went to the movie. I didn't really know Ginny, so I was a little nervous. What would we talk about for three hours? Those hours flew by. And so began a friendship that has been one of the greatest gifts of our lives.

Over twenty-five years we have spent thousands of hours together. I have a mental slideshow of us around countless tables sharing meals together. At our home - three different ones in twenty-five years - or theirs - two different homes. At restaurants and church events. At weddings and funerals. For several years in a row we went on vacations together, so there we are at our rental home tables in Cape Cod, in Maine, in Delaware. Thanks to the grocery store's free turkey promotion, every year that we could we shared a holiday dinner between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Of course, our kids grew up around those tables with the Millards. It was on one of our vacations that we became the Zillardniks. (Spelling will vary. We never discussed spelling!) None of us really remember whose idea it was, but I think it was Tim's. Those thousands of hours spent together fill a treasure box of memories. Each one is precious.

Are You A Fixer? Yeah. Me, too.

October 24, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord GOD is the eternal Rock.” ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭26:3-4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

When you look at the news headlines, don’t you just want to tell them what they need to do to make things right? The constant squabbling between those with differing opinions is perpetually swirling in the air, clouding our vision, dimming hope for a peaceful future in our nation or in the world.

Like the football fan who yells at the TV telling the quarterback what he should have done, I have a tendency to look at people and situations, on the news or in person, and think that if they would just do things my way, everything would turn out okay. I hate to admit it, but I am a recovering fixer. They say admitting a problem is the beginning of overcoming it and I admitted that problem — let’s call it what it is: an addiction — a long time ago, but any recovery process is slow, isn’t it? I have come a long way, but I still have a looooong way to go! What about you? Are you a fixer?

When my kids were young, I read an article In a Christian parenting magazine that pegged me in an uncomfortably accurate way. It was called Confessions of Mr. and Mrs. Fix-it. The point of the article was that, as parents, we try so hard to fix the things in our kids that we think need correcting, but, very often God will use someone else to finally enlighten our kids to their need for change. I recognized my own patterns of constant fixing as I read the article and squirmed. Perhaps that was the moment when I first admitted my fixing habit. It made me more aware of my need to trust God with my kids instead of taking on all the responsibility for behavior repair. Still, even now that they are grown, I have to keep working on it.

Who’s Responsible For This Mess?

October 17, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” ‭‭Galatians‬ ‭6:5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I don’t know about you, but I am becoming increasingly uncomfortable just thinking about checking the news headlines. Whether it’s the latest COVID numbers, the 2020 election, natural disasters or injustice reaching the boiling point, it seems like every headline emphasizes the pain of living in this broken world. There is so much that is wrong with the world right now that it can become overwhelming. Am I the only one who feels this way? I expect not.

I know that some people take on every one of those headlines like a boulder in a backpack. They feel the weight and struggle to get through each day. That weight may feel like depression, but it can also feel like anger. Or anxiety. Maybe your brain tries to imagine every outcome, none of which are very comforting.

Of course, there are others who totally ignore any negative feelings and just skip to speaking the positives. You know, “God is in control!” Well, He is. There is no doubt about that, but there are times when making that positive declaration isn’t really a statement of faith. There are times when the right words are spoken as a way to deny the insecurity we all experience as part of our humanity. Being human is a risky occupation. Especially in a time like 2020, we are constantly reminded that being human has it’s limits. There is pretty much nothing that we have control over. Well, there is one thing I do have control over: Me. And the one thing you have control over: You.

So, what can we do? What can i do in the midst of all this uncertainty? What is my role in this historically unparalleled time? What is yours? If the only thing that we have control over is ourselves, how do we focus our thoughts and energy? What do we do to take responsibility for that one thing?

The Significance of Simplicity

October 10, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“But thank God! He has made us his captives and continues to lead us along in Christ’s triumphal procession. Now he uses us to spread the knowledge of Christ everywhere, like a sweet perfume. Our lives are a Christ-like fragrance rising up to God. But this fragrance is perceived differently by those who are being saved and by those who are perishing. To those who are perishing, we are a dreadful smell of death and doom. But to those who are being saved, we are a life-giving perfume. And who is adequate for such a task as this?” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭2:14-16‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I am one of those people who likes to take time at the beginning of every year to review the year that has past and to set some goals for the year ahead. What about you? Did you write down some goals for 2020? Even if you didn’t write anything down, I bet that you had a few things that you wanted to accomplish this year. I know I did. How’s it going for you?

2020 is probably the most unusual year that any of us have ever experienced. Noting has played out according to plan for any of us. We are all in unfamiliar territory and any plans we had are out the window. Am I right?

When life is interrupted it can be unsettling. All our plans are thrown into disarray. It causes us to have to reevaluate what is really important. So, in the middle of all this confusion and instability, how can you find focus? What is it that you really need to accomplish in 2020? What do I need to accomplish? What should our goals look like?

Lessons From Recovery

October 3, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” ‭‭Philippians‬ ‭2:13‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I came home from the hospital on Sunday after six days in residence. In medical history questionnaires I could always answer “no” to any kind of surgery. No more! Surgery is used to correct areas of the body that need healing, but then the corrections need their own healing, right? So, how am I doing after surgery? I feel great! Still, there are lessons I am learning as I am in the recovery process.

We are all in recovery. You are in recovery too. Did you know that? All creation is subject to groaning, to ill-health. All creation is waiting for the day when the perfection God intended is restored. (Romans 8:22-23) That includes you and me. Once we give our hearts to Christ, the process of recovery from the sickness of sin begins. However, the complete healing won’t be manifest until the day we are in Christ’s presence continually, until we go to Him in heaven or the day He comes back to earth. We are all in recovery. So, how is your recovery going? Let me share a few things that I am learning in this physical recovery process. Perhaps it will encourage you in your own recovery.

Quick Thoughts From Room 314

September 26, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

So, I am writing today from an unexpected location. Room 314 at my local hospital. Those of you who know me and love me will be telling me to rest, and I am. But I just wanted to shoot out a couple quick thoughts. This will be short. I promise!

What I thought was an intestinal bug on Sunday afternoon, became a trip to the emergency room on Monday night, an emergency procedure on Tuesday morning and surgery on Thursday morning. I am in day two of surgery recovery and feeling really good. So, don’t worry! We all have times that don’t turn out as we expected, so I thought I would share with you a few things that I am learning from this experience.

God often answers prayers in unexpected ways. I have been working with a medical professional to try to resolve an issue. Details are unimportant and unnecessary in this case, believe me! I had been referred to a specialist and had an appointment scheduled for Tuesday afternoon. I obviously didn’t see him Tuesday afternoon, but I did see him at 5:00am in the OR. My prayer in preparation for that appointment was, “God, what does my body need?” This whole episode made clear exactly what my body needed and I will not have those issues anymore. Not what I expected, but thoroughly answered.

I really never am alone.

He's In There!

September 19, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

In the beginning the Word already existed.The Word was with God, and the Word was God. John 1:1

My favorite person to spend time with is my husband, Tom. I would rather be sitting with him doing nothing than doing anything else in the world. Being with Tom is my safe place. In our 33 years of marriage he has grown into someone who has helped me to be more secure and confident. He has challenged me and encouraged me to pursue God and helped me to become more like my best self in that process. He's my favorite person.

You have a favorite person, too, right? I'll be you could say some of the same things about your favorite person. Our favorite people make us feel like our best self, the person we want to be.

What if you thought of God as your favorite person? Really! I want to challenge and encourage you to spend time with God in His Word. Notice I did not say that I want to challenge and encourage you to read the Bible more. Just reading the Bible doesn't do much for building a relationship with God.

My Favorite Book

September 12, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning. 3 Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4 In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:1-5

When I was five years old and living in Lake Ronkonkoma, Long Island, New York, there was a summer bus that brought us to the public library. I think it was then that I learned to love books. Reading became my favorite pastime. While other kids were playing tag, I was reading a book. Reading became my comfort and my escape. I would get lost in the stories. Sometimes I even stayed up all night to get to the end of a book!

When I became a follower of Jesus, it was very natural for me to love reading the Bible, but there is something that makes the Bible different from every other book: This book lives. God is present in the pages of the Bible.

What Does It Look Like To “Break Open” For Jesus?

September 5, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“Meanwhile, Jesus was in Bethany at the home of Simon, a man who had previously had leprosy. While he was eating, a woman came in with a beautiful alabaster jar of expensive perfume made from essence of nard. She broke open the jar and poured the perfume over his head. Some of those at the table were indignant. “Why waste such expensive perfume?” they asked. “It could have been sold for a year’s wages and the money given to the poor!” So they scolded her harshly. But Jesus replied, “Leave her alone. Why criticize her for doing such a good thing to me? You will always have the poor among you, and you can help them whenever you want to. But you will not always have me. She has done what she could and has anointed my body for burial ahead of time. I tell you the truth, wherever the Good News is preached throughout the world, this woman’s deed will be remembered and discussed.” ‭‭Mark‬ ‭14:3-9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Whatever you are going through right now, my friend, in the midst of a global pandemic, national anger, political unrest and economic insecurity, what would it look like for you to break open what you have for Jesus? This woman had little of value, but gave the most valuable thing she had for Jesus. She “did what she could” to honor Jesus above all else. What does she teach us of what it might look like for you and I to “break open” for Jesus?

Limitless

August 29, 2020 Cathleen Zahradnik

“For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” Psalm 103:11-12 NIV

One of my favorite places is the beach. I love to stand on the sand with the expanse of the ocean in front of me, miles of blue over my head and a long stretch of sand as far as my eyes can see to either side of me. Can you see it? Ahhhh!