How To Be The Best You

April 6, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

Road trip! I love a road trip! On our road trips I have usually been the navigator. Years ago a long road trip needed a great deal of planning. After the destination was decided I would pull out my road atlas and determine the best route. The Internet made it easier when I could search a mapping website and print out directions. Now, I pull out my phone, type in the destination and let my GPS speak the directions turn by turn. Definitely easier! Yet each method of finding the way starts the same: I have to decide where I am going.

When it comes to your adventure with God do you have an idea where you are going? Not specifics. None of us really knows that in advance. With God we get the turn-by-turn directions as we go. But God does want to give us an idea of what direction to head in. Have you asked Him about it?

When you know what direction He wants you to head in you will find yourself motivated to keep growing. Growth doesn’t happen randomly. It happens intentionally. Where do you find your motivation to keep growing? Are you looking to please other people? Are you looking for happiness? Are you looking to fulfill a self-made dream? How’s that going?

If You Don’t Run, You Can’t Win!

March 30, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

In the movie Chariots of Firethe runner Harold Abrahams has just lost a race to Eric Liddell. He sits in the empty stadium staring, depressed, despondent. He just can’t move on from the loss, reliving it in his mind. His girlfriend, Sybil, arrives and tries to encourage him. She tells him how marvelous he was in spite of the loss. He angrily tells her, “If I can’t win, I won’t run!” She wisely, and just as angrily replies, “If you don’t run, you can’t win!” Harold’s goal was perfection, to win every race. Up until that moment he had achieved that goal. Losing the race shattered his dream of perfection. What now?. Perfection was no longer an option. Why even try? In that moment he was paralyzed. He needed a different goal. But what? I totally get Harold’s thinking. I have often found that perfecionistic tendencies keep me from even trying. Could that be you, too?

Don’t Let Weariness Win

March 23, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

I unsuccessfully attempted to become a runner for a period of time. I got up before the sun and shivered on the way to the gym where I found an empty treadmill. I put in my earbuds and listened to an app that coached me through alternating walking and running to build up endurance and help me to run longer. The voice on the app wouldn’t just tell me when to walk and when to run. At intervals the voice would encourage me. “Halfway there!””You’re doing great!” The app designers recognized that potential athletes would experience fatigue. They might feel like the physical challenge was just too hard, the running time too long. They might want to give up and needed encouragement to keep going. I never became a runner. I really prefer walking, not a leisurely stroll, but a brisk walk. However, while I was running that app helped me to push beyond what I thought I was capable of. I ran longer and farther than I had ever thought possible. I needed the coaching to help me do that, even a virtual one helped. Wouldn’t it be great to have a coach like that for life?

Friend, I don’t know what your challenges are right now, but I know that sometimes you might just get worn out

Resist The Resistance

March 16, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

I’ll bet you wouldn’t peg me as a Star Wars fan. True, I am more partial to the original trilogy and have had a harder time warming up to the newer offerings. But, if a Star Wars movie comes out I want to see it. I want to know what happens in that universe. I want to see how the story progresses. Let’s be honest here, as long as the Star Wars franchise is making money the story will never actually end. That’s okay with me. So, what is it that grabs me, and so many others, into spending a few dollars to watch this crowd of familiar and fresh faces flying through hyperspace? What catches us?

There’s a moment in The Last Jedi, the most recent Star Wars film (not spinoff) that I think says it all. Finn and Rose (Don’t know who they are? Ok, “The good guys”) are on a mission to defeat the First Order (The bad guys) and they need help. They meet a few kids working in a stable and earn their favor with the acknowledgement “We’re with the Resistance.” The kids faces light up and they are in. There is something in all of us that wants to be with the Resistance, we want to be with the good guys defeating evil. That’s why we stand in line and buy tickets.

In Star Wars being with the resistance is a good thing. But resistance isn’t always good, is it? Sometimes resistance is the thing holding you back from accomplishing what you know God has called you to. Sometimes resistance is the force opposing you rather than the force opposing evil. So how do you handle that kind of resistance? What do you do when the resistance is fighting against you?

Does God Really Want To Use Me?

March 9, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

Have you ever been so afraid of making the wrong decision that you do nothing? That was my modus operandi for years.

One time as a teenager I had the opportunity to go to a conference on leading music in church. At the time I was a member of a music team at a denominational church and was being groomed to become the leader. Yes, I WAS a teenager. The thought of stepping into a leadership position was paralyzing. I had trouble making even small decisions. How was I going to be a leader?

I had never been to anything like that conference before, so the whole experience was new and a bit overwhelming. The conference included lunch in the college cafeteria where the event was being held. We could choose anything and it was okay. Hot lunch, cold sandwiches, salads, fruit, desserts. Whatever I wanted. As much as I wanted. For some people that may sound like heaven but, I was overwhelmed. Too many choices became a fear of making the wrong choice. I wandered through the aisles longer than anyone else on our team and finally sat down with two things on my tray. I don’t even remember what they were. Whatever they were, I couldn’t enjoy ithem. Did I make the right choice? What if I missed something better?

Fear of making a wrong decision clouded my ability simply to choose lunch! How was I ever going to become a leader?

Real Life Is Outside Your Comfort Zone

March 2, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

A sudden sound jars me awake. What is that? Oh, yeah. The alarm is beeping. Where is that remote for the alarm clock? There it is! Button pressed. Ah! Ten more minutes. I snuggle down under my comforter and head back to sleep. But what about getting up to write? What about my time with God? It is so cozy under my comforter, the soft warmth lulling sleepiness. I don’t want to get up! Through the morning brain fog I begin to hear a deeper, more subtle sound from within me. “Come on. It’s time to get up. We have some things to do together.” My feet are on the floor. I quickly find my slippers and pull on my bathrobe against the chill air. I’m up. Time for a warm cup of coffee and some time time doing what I know God wants from me.

Comfort. There’s a lucious word! It sounds so good. Hot cocoa and a warm blanket. Grandma’s chicken soup. A hot cup of tea on a cold day. Lunch with a good friend. A snowy evening at home watching a movie with the family. None of those things are wrong or bad. But let’s consider a different kind of comfort: I stay in a job that is less than satisfying, but easy to do or at least fits with my plans. I keep to a ministry position I’ve done for years, but is below my potential. I stay within my circle of friends and don’t reach out to anyone new. I ignore the nagging sense that God is calling me to more than who I am and what I am doing.

If I choose being comfortable over pursuing God’s purpose for me, then it doesn’t matter how good I might feel.

When You Don’t Know What To Do, Know Who You Are Doing It For

February 23, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

Peer pressure. I think peer pressure is at it’s worst in middle school. I not only lived through that labyrinth myself, I observed it for ten years as an employee of a public middle school. I attended middle school in the late 1970’s, a time af great social change and national insecurity. But middle school was still middle school.

One outgrowth of that period in history was a move toward a more casual society. Whereas, previous generations dressed up to go to school, my generation was wearing jeans. (When I worked in the middle school the slide continued and some kids even wore pajamas!) My mom, as a member of the previous generation, was resolute for a long time that I would not be allowed to wear jeans to school. I not only had to wear skirts, but knee socks with skirts! I was already a shy and awkward girl who loved reading and actually liked school. This put me in the lowest social strata, but dressing like an old lady sunk my social standing even further. All I wanted was to fit in and maybe even be accepted by at lease one cool kid, or even gain a notice from the cutest, coolest boy in homeroom. I pleaded with my mom and, eventually, I was allowed to wear jeans. My relaxed wardrobe didn’t garner any cool-kid friends, but at least I could blend in with the crowd and was less of a target for ridicule. My pressure to be a “peer” was reduced and my need for acceptance was quieted, temporarily.

When You Don’t Know What To Do, Know Who You Want to Be

February 16, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

When I think about who I wanted to be, I can’t not write about Sharon. It didn’t take long after I became a Jesus-follower for me to decide who I wanted to be when I grew up. I wanted to be like Sharon. Sharon was my friend’s mother, my pastor’s wife and my mentor. She didn’t know she was my mentor, but mentors aren’t always people you get together with and ask questions of. Sometimes they are simply the people you look up to who show you who you want to be. I wanted to be like Sharon. She was a loving, passionate woman of God. She knew the Scriptures and taught them well. She encouraged and inspired other women to live whole-heartedly for God. She was gracious and had a warm smile added to her gentle Southern drawl that made people feel comfortable and welcomed.

I wanted to be like Sharon so I began to model my behavior after her, or at least I thought I did.

When You Don’t Know What To Do, Know Where To Go

February 9, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

Fog. It’s inevitable and unavoidable. The only way to avoid traveling through fog is to suspend your journey, but sometimes you really have no choice. You just have to go through it. Right? In order to get to our home town we have to drive over a mountain. Sometimes simply following the road up will lead you right into fog. There’s nothing you can do about it. There is no other way to go, no way to avoid the mountain, no way to avoid the fog. One of our mountain roads is curvy and lined with woods. Even on clear days nighttime driving over that mountain can be eerie, but in the fog any familiar landmarks are completely obscured. I can’t tell where I am and am unsure that I am headed in the right direction. Our other mountain road is highway up and down a steep incline. In clear weather you can see for miles, but in fog, nothing. It doesn’t even seem like the same road. All I can do is trust what I know and keep going until the fog lifts or until road signs confirm that I have arrived at my destination.

Dear friend, your life may seem a bit foggy right now. Like fog on the road, disillusion and disappointment may be clouding your vision. Things haven’t worked out the way you planned or the way you expected. People you love have hurt you with their words, attitudes and choices. The landmark events you were looking toward are no longer visible. How do you keep going? How do you recalibrate your life to keep moving forward through this fog? How do you know what to do next?

Change Your Perspective. Change Your Life.

February 1, 2019 Cathleen Zahradnik

What’s the biggest transition you have ever gone through? Have you ever traced the threads that lead to the beginning of that shift? If you follow the chain backwards there is no doubt that you will find every change starts with a decision. But along the path there are other decisions that need to be made and those choices shape your experience.

Pat Zahradnik was one of the friendliest people you would ever want to meet. When she went into the bank, she was on a first-name basis with the tellers. She had a quick smile, a friendly wave and a warm greeting for the people in her circle of acquaintance. When it came time to move her out of her apartment in Fishkill, NY the ladies in the office cried to say good-bye because they loved her so much. She was more than just a tenant to them. She had become a friend. I can understand that. She was my mother-in-law and I miss her every day.

Moving Mom out of her apartment was a really big job. The transition began with the decision that taking care of her small home and finances had become too much for her so we had moved her into an independent living home. We moved her with what she needed and then we tackled everything that was left in the apartment. Tom’s siblings lived out of town and out of state and, although they were all supportive of the decision, they were unable to help, which left the two of us with a bigger job than we were up for.